Stay Tuned

Story Developing…Stay Tuned!

Toms River, New Jersey

A professor conducting research on technology use recently challenged a class of 34 students, telling them that whoever will manage to avoid looking at or using cellphones (their own or others’) or any other form of technology for a 24-hour period will receive $100.

A week later, when the class met again, one student raised her hand and asked to read a thank-you letter she wrote to the teacher, in which she thanked the teacher for a priceless opportunity to experience a stress-free day the likes of which she had not experienced in years. The student shared that her challenge regarding technology is not about inappropriate sites, but about simple waste of time.

Moving on to the next step of his research, the professor chose a kosher internet site and listed the first random twenty headlines. He asked the students to choose the top three stories that they suspect would interest them. The results were amazing. Most of the students could not even find three headlines that really interested them. Most chose two – largely the same two headlines.

When I heard this story, I decided to try it too. I reviewed a random list of headlines in a kosher website and tried to find the ones that would truly interest me. The results were the same – hardly any.

Want to try this yourself? Below is a (shortened, due to space constraints) list of headlines from a single day in a standard news website, filtered only for non-kosher, lashon hara or rechilus material but otherwise a fairly typical serving of a day’s headlines:

• WhatsApp, Facebook and Instagram Back Up After Massive Outage
• Dems Defend Muslim Rep. Omar after Trump Tweets Video Aainst Her Outrageous 9/11 Comments
• Trump “Strongly Looking” at Releasing Illegal Immigrants in Democrat “Sanctuary Cities”
• Israeli Airstrike on Syrian Military Position Wounds 6
• Uber Reveals Strong Growth, Huge Losses Ahead of IP
• The Chesed Fund Saves Organizations Over $2 Million in Fees
• In California, Giant Stratolaunch Jet Flies for First Time
• Hacker Group Posts Hundreds of Law Officer Records
• Man Lit Himself on Fire at the White House
• NY Comptroller Sees Big Jump in Bogus State Tax Refunds
• Swallowed Toys, Coins, Batteries Spark Rise in Toddler ER Visits
• Trump Campaign Eyes Chances to Vie for States Lost in 2016

Who cares, right? In reality, most of us could do without this superfluous brain clutter.

Honestly, when there is no hotlink to click on out of vague curiosity, boredom, or a subconscious desire to push off work a few more moments, it is hardly even interesting. Looking at the comments that people post underneath some of these stories is painful. Is this what we have stooped to?

If I had the time, I would conduct my own scientific research. I would like to know the answer to the following question: How much time does an average frum person waste daily on unnecessary (perfectly filtered, of course) technology use? I assumed the answer to be a full hour a day. Sharing my suspicion with a friend, he shot back, “Wrong, much more!” Unfortunately, he seems to be correct.

Hours a day are wasted on random bits of boring information that hardly even register and serve no purpose other than… well, nothing. Can you imagine what would happen if we managed to reduce our wasted time by just half? How many hours of learning could we accomplish? How many acts of chessed could we perform? How much money could we earn? How much more time for our families, perhaps even looking directly at their faces when we talk to them?

I chose the title of this article based on a news story I was listening to recently while driving. The reporter, out of breath and speaking in an urgent tone, was reporting on a murder that occurred the night before in a less-than-desirable neighborhood. He ended his short report by saying that a member from his station was making his way to the crime scene and they will keep us updated on the developing story. I thought to myself, Okay, I heard what happened. Why, exactly, do any of us need to know the details of this story? Our time is limited, and we need to use every minute productively and sensibly.

…Or have we forgotten that?

Imagine a person who, for whatever odd reason, went to sleep and woke up 36 hours later. He had gone to sleep extremely tired at 11:00 pm on Motzai Shabbos, and woke up 7:00 am on Monday morning. Sunday was completely wiped out of his life.

Of course, there would be many ramifications to this scenario, not the least of which his missing tefillos, Tefillin, etc. But beyond that, the person will experience the excruciating pain of having lost an entire day of his life. A full day went by while he slept and did nothing! What a waste of precious time!

A lost day. What makes a day “lost”? If a person goes through his day functioning at some level and performing the basic daily mitzvos, is that enough to consider the day “not lost”? Why is the definition of “lost” primarily when there is zero conscious function? Can it be lost even while awake and part of what is going on?

Rav Moshe Midner famously said that “a day in which a person has not performed an act of chessed is not considered a day.” Clearly, “time lost” is more than about sleeping through the daily news. Let us try to examine our understanding of time, and what we can do to instill proper appreciation of this priceless commodity into our children – and ourselves. This is becoming more and more difficult as the world around us fills with things that seem to imply that time is endless and valueless.

I found it interesting that the reason behind the custom of giving a chosson a gold watch is to teach him that time is precious. A beautiful goal…only about twenty years too late. I suggest that we take active measures to teach this important lesson to our children far earlier.

Time.

The hands of the clock move, tangibly showing us that time is ebbing away. We know that our time is limited. Why do we not value it? Why do we treat it as if we have all the time in the world? (We don’t.)

One of the reasons for this is that, clocks and watches and cellphones aside, time is not tangible. And as much as we know that a human being’s days in this world are limited, there is the sense that there is always tomorrow, at least. Yet I believe there are even more significant barriers which we can and must deal with.

For starters, the vacation systems. Without getting into a debate as to whether our children – and adults – have too much vacation time, simple statistics show that the average number of school days in a year is less than 180. What this statistic means is that our children are in school less than half of the year, with no counter-steps to help them utilize and value the remaining half. Does this perhaps help us understand at least some of the problem?

Regardless of the way the school system works, children must learn that the three pillars of the world – Torah, avodah and gemilus chassadim – take no vacation. They must be taught and shown that even during vacation, some steps in each of these areas must be taken every single day. Of course, the best way for them to learn this is by seeing the adults around them practicing this value. Their parents’ vacation days, primarily (but not only) are the best time to show them how valuable time is, and that time takes no vacation, either – it continues to ebb away and we must grab onto every moment we can utilize and keep as ours forever.

One of the old practices of mussar has always been a daily “din vecheshbon.” I have no doubt that there are still people today who perform this daily practice; I just do not know who they are. Truthfully, by performing some form of daily accounting with our children about the past day will have huge ramifications on their perspective and appreciation of every moment and every day.

Another way to teach children the importance of time is by showing them the value of short increments of time. For example, if a parent establishes a daily five-minute routine of shared study or activity, especially an accumulative one (such as studying a small part of a sefer together or working toward a specific goal), the child will tangibly see how even these short periods of time amount to a successful accomplishment. I know of a young man who finished all of Mishnayos by learning with his father for just five minutes every day. Sure, it took quite a few years, but only five minutes at a time! In addition to completing all of Mishnah, this young man clearly developed very strong values about the importance of time.

We all grew up knowing that “time is money.” At least, that is the way most people end that sentence. Yet we know better. Time is life.

A friend of mine shared a great parallel for understanding and appreciating the value of time. I am not sure of its origin, but this illustration can serve as a powerful tool to help us value the precious time we are given here in this world. Imagine that there is a certain bank which credits your account each morning with $86,400 which you can spend as you wish. Yet the bank does not carry over the balance to the next day. Each day you can spend as much of the daily allowance as you wish, but whatever you do not use is deleted from your account at the end of the day. What would you do?

Draw out every last penny daily, of course!

Yes, we all do have such an account. Every morning, we are “credited” with 86,400 seconds to use as we wish. Every night, our account is wiped clean of anything we did not use appropriately or invested in a good purpose. Our account carries over no balance. It allows no overdraft. Each day, a new account is opened. Each night, the remaining records are burned. If you fail to use the day’s deposits, it is your loss and it cannot be reclaimed again. There is no going back, no drawing against tomorrow. Tomorrow is a new account, which you would have (hopefully) had anyway – it is not a compensation for what you have lost today.

I am sure you have all heard the great saying, “Time is a gift – that is why it is called the ‘present’.”

Live in the present, in the moment that you were given right now. It will never return. You can use it to read boring news that will dissipate from your mind a moment later, or worse – fester in your brain and cause untold damage for eternity, or you can grab onto it and turn it into an eternal treasure. Use it to bog yourself down with a sense of discontentment and self-loathing, or invest it to gain health, success and joy in life.

Time is life. Time is eternity.  Time does not have to ebb away. Every minute well-spent is a minute that remains our forever. All we need is to grab as many passing minutes as we can!

Run along now. The clock is ticking!